My second week in the Practicing Solitude. I have to admit this is getting really hard for me.

Solitude is a place to encounter God and myself, and I love it. But I realized today I was not ready to encounter myself. This week, I have been experiencing so much darkness-nothing specific, just a heavy energy surrounding me. I can’t motivate myself during the day to do anything, and I have nightmares at night.

I am impatient with God, and I am mad at Him. I want to say: “Being a faithful believer is extremely hard!” Many times, I just feel this dark impulse to walk away from all these devotional practices and indulge in something easier, more tangible, and happy.

I know this is the part of myself I do not see in the “distraction”.

I know this is the part of myself God wants me to see in the journey He planned for me.