no reason to feel jealous

I’m sorry when I’ve just gone through the motions
I’m sorry when I just sang another song
Take me back to where we started
I open up my heart to You

The lyrics from “Nothing Else” by Cody Carnes have resonated deeply with me these past two weeks. Since closing on the house, my focus has been entirely consumed by it. The whirlwind of settling into our new home has made me realize that God has slipped from being my top priority. I can feel that I’m on a dangerous path.

For two and a half years, my husband and I lived in an RV, constantly moving to explore the world. Receiving mail was a challenge, so today, when a package arrived on our front porch, it brought me so much joy. Yet, I’ve noticed something unsettling: the more I have, the more I seem to want. Moving from an RV to a house is something we’re deeply grateful for, but I’ve caught myself focusing on the flaws in our new home. On the way to the grocery store today, I even found myself admiring other people’s houses and feeling a twinge of envy.

But then I stopped and reminded myself: I have a beautiful home. There’s no reason to feel even a little bit jealous.

Human nature is dangerous

Human nature is dangerously tricky. From my observations, the wealthiest people I know often don’t seem as happy as those who have less. I never want to fall into that trap. True happiness is an ability, not something that depends on what I own.

Thank God for today’s Bible study. The two hours spent with God and fellow believers have re-centered me. On the way home, I kept praying for the Lord to take hold of my heart and place Himself at the center. I’ve been getting distracted by worldly things that give only fleeting highs, leaving me in a state of spiritual withdrawal.

Only You, God, can truly satisfy my soul. Please keep me close, nudge me, push me, even force me if necessary, to walk towards You and not away. Without You, I am lost and incapable of making the right decisions for myself.