Unexpected Marriage Retreat

Last night, we checked into our first Christian marriage retreat. We had signed up for it last year, but both of us got really sick and had to cancel. I’m so glad we made it this time, though it feels like the enemy is working overtime to keep us from focusing on strengthening our marriage. We both had a rough night’s sleep, and during this morning’s session, we received the heartbreaking news that my mother-in-law was rushed to the hospital and is unresponsive.

The news hit us hard, right in the middle of an emotionally intense group exercise. People were opening up, getting vulnerable, and we were supposed to do the same. Instead, we both ended up in tears, overwhelmed by everything happening all at once.

Impossible Love

My mother-in-law has always been a difficult person to love. She has a narcissistic personality, and it’s exhausting to spend time around her. She’s frequently in poor health, so the family isn’t really surprised by the recent bad news. A small, selfish part of us even feels a sense of relief, knowing she might no longer cause further divisions within the family.

But as children of God, our hearts still ache. Despite the hurt and unhappiness she’s brought, we grieve the potential loss of someone so close. I struggle to love someone who feels unlovable, but I’m grateful that my Heavenly Father offers the impossible love to those I believe don’t deserve it. I can’t imagine what it’s like to face death, but I pray that God will guide my mother-in-law’s soul to a place of peace.

As a human, I know I’ll likely always remember the hurt she caused. But I want to surrender all of that to God. I’ll give what little I can to support her in this difficult time. I’m far from perfect, but I want to try.