I’ve been seeing messages about prayer and praise as our “secret weapons” for a while. Today’s devotional added worship to my secret weapon list, and it felt like a deep confirmation for me.

I shared with my husband that I feel God has been “weaponizing” me lately. He replied, “Good, we have big enemies.”

On October 14, my husband lost his mother at the age of 67—far sooner than we ever expected. It happened right in the middle of our marriage retreat. We found ourselves crying, both for her and for the healing of our marriage. It all felt so surreal, but I sense that God is preparing us for bigger challenges. The retreat taught us so much, and my husband was even able to apply the tools we learned to help process his grief right away.

With family spread across different locations, we’ll be holding two more memorials this month, and we’ll be taking her ashes back to her birthplace in PEI, Canada, for burial. I’ll be traveling for two long weeks, and I know many challenges lie ahead, both from this loss and the family dynamics that come with it.

But God keeps reminding me that He is faithful and loving and always goes before me. Thank you, Father God, for Your unfailing love. And I will worship you through grief.