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I don’t serve you anymore

I don’t serve you anymore I often wake up with an anxious feeling, hearing a nagging voice inside me saying: “Get up quickly, go back to your work.” “Double-check things, there must be something you missed yesterday, and it will cause big problems if you don’t.” These thoughts are deeply

June 28, 2024

A new voice

Morning I started watching the show “The Chosen.” I just finished season 1, my soul lights up during every episode. This is my first show about Jesus, and my heart rejoices in His character. All the disciples kept asking questions because their hearts were swollen with fear. But Jesus showed

June 27, 2024

There is no catch

Morning This morning was one of those when I got up to go to the bathroom and could never fall back to sleep. At 3:30 am, I was just lying in bed, swamped with thoughts. Instead of falling into that black hole of thoughts, I kept repeating in my heart:

June 26, 2024

to live like Jesus

Today is another slow day. I don’t feel anxious of unproductive days anymore. On the contrary, I am grateful for God arranging those days for me to reflect and really enjoy quiet time. I practiced to include God into my trivial decision-making process. Instead of pick a direction jumping right

June 25, 2024

mighty forces will come to your aid

Today I didn’t get much deep sleep last night, kept waking up. The spiritual wind I felt yesterday really stirred me. I felt pretty drained today, the same feeling I had during the practice of solitude when I was fighting against the darkness within me. But this time is quite

June 24, 2024

nothing but standing on holy ground

Morning  During the worship song today, I broke down, crying non-stop. I think this is what people call a “Jesus moment.” It all started with a prayer question: “Lord, where do you want me to go? How do you want me to serve?” Since I felt my calling to be

June 23, 2024

don’t want what I want

Today we talked to a realtor I met through a church event. She is really helpful, and we both feel good about working with her. Tonight we watched the show “The Chosen.” In the episodes that tell the story of Simon, one of the issues his wife pointed out was

June 22, 2024

Everything is perfect

Surrender Control Walking with God requires obedience. Like many others, I struggle with being obedient. Our culture loudly advocates for being a strong, independent woman and not letting others tell you what to do, which is the complete opposite of walking with God. I have experienced enough to fully trust

June 21, 2024

four-step cycle

Today, the craving to own our property resurfaced. This time, I am more aware of how my mind reacts to it. I have been stuck in this four-step cycle for a while, and each time I get stuck, only God can truly pull me out of it. Every time I

June 20, 2024

vigorous but not busy

Dream Both my aunt and my grandpa, two of my very loved family member, are under some kind of relationship attacks. People are constantly putting them in difficult situations, and I was trying to help, but it didn’t work. Journal Proverbs 31 – A Wife of Noble Character I had

June 19, 2024

Willing to do whatever

I easily get frustrated when things aren’t perfect right away. Today’s Bible study was a great reminder that working harder isn’t the solution—patience is. Growing up with a smartphone always in hand, I’ve lost the heart of patience, expecting instant feedback for everything. When the feedback is bad, I keep

June 18, 2024

No relationship can last without Christ

Dream I woke up in the RV to a loud noise outside and peeked out to see three women holding guns and trying to look into the RV. I got super nervous and thought it was some kind of riot. I went to the back, grabbed my gun, and prepared

June 17, 2024

Happy Father’s Day

“God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it.” Ephesians 2:8-9 NLT Today, Pastor Bob revisited this

June 16, 2024

I like myself now

Today, I had the pleasure of meeting Anna again. It’s always refreshing to talk with her. Recently, Julie pointed out that, as extroverts, we get recharged by spending time with others. However, as a Christian, I don’t refuel by socializing with just anyone, I gain energy from being with people

June 15, 2024

Never be a loser

The story about the big toe reminds me of Julie. She once shared that she had broken her toes twice. During the times she was completely disabled and unable to do anything, she deeply felt that she is God’s child, regardless of her actions or abilities. Growing up with a

June 14, 2024

The truth will set you free

Morning “The truth will set you free.” John 8:31-32 NLT Long before I became a Christian, I was living in Beijing, 19 years old, trying to find my identity in this fierce world. One day, I read a phrase somewhere, not in the Bible but in Chinese: “真理只会让你自由” (“The truth

June 13, 2024

He is the only magic

Dream: I was a small business owner located inside a temple, selling incense and Buddha statues for a living. One day, a troubled young boy who appeared on TV shows came in, upset because he wasn’t the main character. He told me he planned to quit his job, go to

June 12, 2024

Ruthlessly eliminate hurry

Dream: I dreamt of Trump, and he was very interested in me. He tried to bribe me to become his lover, sending spies to China to collect many of my family pictures, even ones I had never seen. Gosh, the dream felt so real. I remember seeing a picture of

June 11, 2024

Sweet Fruit

After four weeks of practicing solitude, I have come to truly enjoy my meditation time. Especially when I feel overwhelmed, instead of jumping in and hustling to fix things, I now take a step back. I retreat to my quiet place and seek help from God. Through this experience, I

June 10, 2024

How He wants me to live my life

Sunday had become my new favorite day. In the morning I get to go to church to refuel my soul and in the afternoon I usually take a nap with my husband and our sweet cat.  Those simple things give me so much joy and peace. Happiness can come so

June 9, 2024

His hands is better

Before Jesus died on the cross, He spoke only a few sentences, one of which was, “Into your hands I commit my spirit.” When Pastor Bob preached his series “The Shadow of the Cross,” I was deeply moved by the surrender Jesus demonstrated. Sometimes letting go feels incredibly hard because

June 8, 2024

God planned them out of love

The plan to purchase land has been delayed, so we decided to move to a new RV park with more space. As we were leaving, the RV developed some mechanical issues that worried us. My husband was under the RV troubleshooting the problem. I could tell he was stressed as

June 7, 2024

Fake Fear

”It’s not always easy to move forward in purpose when fear strikes, but it is ultimately a choice we have.  A choice to not allow fear to control your life.  A choice to focus on what is true.  A choice to guard your heart and mind against fear-inducing consumption. A

June 6, 2024

Fulfill His glory, not mine

✿ Morning Today, I had an important realization, marking a significant step forward for me. After years of habitually being a world-pleaser, I’ve developed a tendency to deceive myself. I tell myself that I’m fine and that I don’t have as many issues as others, just to receive applause and

June 5, 2024
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