The Spring Festival holiday is coming to an end, and the big family gatherings are finally over. I could extend my time here as long as I wanted, since I’m so close to my aunt and grandma, but I know I’m here for a different reason. Today, I moved into my mom’s place, not something I was looking forward to, but something I know I need to do.

Since I was 13 or 14, I have been living away from my mom. Things between us had gotten so bad that I moved in with my aunt, and after two years with her, I went to boarding school until I finished my education. I don’t have many happy memories of living with my mom. For a long time, I’ve been running away from her, keeping our relationship at a bare minimum, just enough to be considered available but never truly close. Even now, I can’t say I like her as a person. My care for her mostly comes from pity, and that doesn’t make me want to be near her.

I don’t know what my end goal is in this extended time with her, but I do know I’m meant to be here. So, Lord, I give You my heart, make it Yours. Let me be Your humble child, for I will always love You first. You are my true parent.